Mother's Day, Cannes and Easy Rider

What is "Mother's Day?"

Mom and Me circa 1959

It's the day we celebrate those who brought us into the world.  They claim we all have only one, so depending upon how our relationship was with that person, we celebrate them.  

Some don't celebrate this day. Some don't know their mom, never knew their mom.  Some knew and didn't like their mom, or fought with their mom, or had a hard time with their mom their "whole life."  I'm here to offer a little "Flipside" perspective.

The book Luana got me to write.

In all the 50 cases of people I've filmed under deep hypnosis talking about their moms, they all claimed the same thing; "I chose her."  

They talk about a "life planning session" and then "casting" who is going to play the various roles in a lifetime.  And even the worst parents - you know who I'm talking about - the worst of the worst - were part of that planning session.

Chose what?

One friend who suffered abuse from a parent, while under deep hypnosis was able to examine the moment when she "agreed to participate in that teaching."  She said the parent learned about negativity of their actions, the suffering they caused - and she had "agreed" to participate to help teach these lessons to this person. (It's in the book "It's a Wonderful Afterlife.") After the session she told me, one of her oldest pals, that "years of therapy dissolved during that session."

Doesn't make abuse any less painful - or lessen its impact. But when you can wrap your mind around the idea of "helping someone" out of "compassion" to teach them a painful lesson... it gives it a different perspective.

The bedroom the Dalai Lama left when he escaped.
Still awaiting his return I guess.

The Dalai Lama points out that "everyone" may have been his mother in a past life.  So he tries to act accordingly - when meeting a new person, or even a difficult person.  "This person may have been my mother in a previous lifetime."  Further, he offers this as a valuable meditation - "Imagine for a moment that the person you are having difficulty with was a your mother in a previous life.  She nurtured you, fed you, bathed you - and that possibility forces you to relate to them in a different fashion."

It's a good meditation.  

On Mother's Day, try to remember that everyone might have been a mother.  Or more specifically, on Mother's Day, try to open yourself up to the idea that we've had many lifetimes before, and each one had a mother who brought us into the world.  We may not be able to remember her, (and maybe she's playing a different role in this lifetime) but we can thank her anyway. 

Mother church or mother of gelato. It's both.

I know of a few cases where mothers on their deathbed said the equivalent of "I was your mother in this lifetime, and I'll be your mother again" or "I was your daughter in a previous lifetime but I'm your mom in this one." 

People might dismiss this information as the rantings of age - but it's also in the research, the thousands of cases from Dr. Helen Wambach and Michael Newton - it's worth pausing judgment when a parent says something that we can't quite comprehend... yet.

Happy Mother's day to all of my mothers - including my mom - Anthy Martini in this lifetime.
  

Anthy Martini Concert Pianist

She was hilarious, a treat to be around, was a concert pianist who played up to and including her last day on the planet - and I am happy to have come to the realization that I chose her for a variety of reasons.  She was and is the perfect person to have allowed me to roam freely in my creative work.  Love you to the moon and back (as they say.) So here's to you Momly.

But wait, there's more!

Luana Anders by actor Tom Pittman (who died not
long after taking this)

It's also the birthday of our pal Luana Anders. (Hi Lu!) Fans of Flipside know her as the "mother of flipside research" - because she is the one who inspired it. She died in my arms, turned to me and laughed with her last breath, and since then has been visiting me - either physically (in dreams or have heard her voice) through friends on the flipside, through mediums here (Jennifer Shaffer observed "She is like me, doing the same work over there - she's a medium who helps people communicate with their loved ones - but she's doing it from the flipside").

I've had at least two experiences where I've seen previous lifetimes where I knew Luana.  One (as reported in "Flipside") was in Sumeria - a place I knew nothing about, but reported dutifully while under my first deep hypnosis session. Later I looked up what I had said and found it all to be accurate... "Really? Sumerian? What the heck is that?"

 But then recently, I was shown another lifetime where we lived in Hawaii and were best friends as children.  (Luana and I had been to Hawaii in the past, with our pal Dave Patlak.)  I must say, upon reflection, they behaved like two teens who had known each other for some time while we were together roaming around the islands, and I had this odd experience of being the nagging parent; "You two!  Stop giggling, I'm trying to map where we're going."  

Luana hugging Mick Gough backstage
(Batman's original butler and long time pal)

It's mind bending I know - but I've stopped asking "how could that be?" and focused on "So if that's the case, what did we learn from back then?"

Then "Easy Rider" popped onto my radar.

Luana Anders. The mother of flipside research.
In a mirror of a mirror; also in "Easy Rider"

"Easy Rider" is playing at Cannes this year - the 50th anniversary.  Luana appeared in this film back in the 1960's, because the cast is alphabetical, she's the first name that pops onto the screen.

Some thoughts about it:

I saw it when I was 14 in Chicago. I may have seen it 6 or 7 times - 8 years later, I came out to film school at USC and met Luana (who happened to play Peter Fonda's girlfriend in the film.) That was in 1979. Through Luana I met pretty much everyone involved on the film, from assistant Editor Henry Jaglom to Karen Black, to Jack, Peter and Dennis as well as Burt Schneider.

Luana and Peter in Easy Rider

Then 7 years after I met Lu, I happen to cast Peter's daughter in "You Can't Hurry Love" (Bridget Fonda) in her first speaking role.  I knew she was Peter's daughter, but honestly wasn't making a connection to Luana's film. (Luana plays my aunt Macie in "You Can't Hurry Love" as well as co-wrote and appeared in "Limit Up." ) She appears in "Point of Betrayal" as a nurse who "solves the mystery" for Rod Taylor, and later, when she was too ill to come to the set, did a cameo as a "voice on the phone in the film "Cannes Man."  

Luana and Dennis in Night Tide by Curtis Harrington

So in essence, Luana and Dennis - who starred together in the film "Night Tide" were both in my film, the last one Luana appeared in (and gets a laugh with her line deliver from her hospital bed.)

Luana in "Pit and the Pendulum" produced by fellow
Jeff Corey classmate Roger Corman

Which pulls us back into the circle of life.  

Because Dennis Hopper appears in Cannes Man.  I met Dennis at the preschool where his daughter and mine went to school and we chatted about Luana.  Dennis had sent the "largest bouquet" I've ever seen to Luana's funeral (in 1996) - and it was as giant as the one sent by Jack Nicholson.  Both boys vied for her affection - Jack in a more demonstrable way of loyalty and friendship; he put her in most of the films he made, and mentioned her when he got the Oscar for "As Good As It Gets."

Luana in a publicity still

But in Dennis' case - I knew Luana for 20 years and don't recall Dennis ever reaching out to her the way Jack did.  I had helped Luana rewrite her script "Real Feelings" (Producer Fred Roos is trying to make it, about her days with Jack Nicholson, Sally Kellerman, Robert Towne - all pals in the Jeff Corey class) and I knew that she had written a hilariously funny real life scene when she lost her virginity to Dennis.  

He was a pal at the time and she had orchestrated the event to "get it over with" (she was the only person of her pals who hadn't "lost her cherry" as she called it) and Dennis "obliged." The scene is laugh-out-loud funny, as well as touching in light of the both of them being no longer on the planet.  But when I read it, I knew it was the most compelling writing of a scene of its kind I have ever read.  And I knew it to be accurate (as she told me so when she wrote it.)

Luana and Michael Gough while doing
Broadway in the 1960's.

Cut to last week; 

during a filmed session with Jennifer Shaffer, talking to people on the Flipside when I asked Luana if there was anyone in our group (over there) who "wanted to come forward?"  Jennifer said she saw Dennis.  (Looking thin, wearing oval glasses, short hair. I always ask "what's he look like to you?")

Jennifer Shaffer

He had a message for one of his children, and I did my best to pass it along to that child.  (A friend of a friend.)

I took the opportunity to ask him why he sent this huge bouquet to Luana's funeral when they "weren't that close."  

He said "I always felt connected to her, even though it wasn't consciously."  

I asked if they "had a previous lifetime together" that he could recall.  He told a long story about being a sailor in London (name of the ship, the year, etc which I will research) and how he had met her in Barcelona - she was a dancer, and he made frequent trips in that lifetime - and how they had a child together.  (He also told me that child is on the planet today, someone that he is connected to, and asked me to pass along the message "Everything is going to work out" that the troubles the child is going through is via someone who "is focused on money" is "not telling the truth" and that it will "eventually disappear."

Cannes Man with everyone who Seymour Cassel
talked into being in this film

I'm not being cagey when I don't mention the name of the person he was talking about - it's not up to me to focus on that end of it. I passed it along as best I could. I have had friends feel violated when I've told  them "Oh, by the way, I talked to your dad/mom and they told me to tell you the following..." 

Hacking the Afterlife

First, they think I'm nuts, then they feel upset that I would have the gall to "pass along a message" from someone who they are still mourning. 

I can only offer that if my mom appears to someone with a message - please, pass it along. I'll know at first glance how accurate it is.  

Luana Anders by Monte Hellman

Back to Luana.

During this session, she said she was worried about a mutual friend (still on the planet). I asked her to clarify for Jennifer and Jennifer said "She showed me this friend passing out. Fainted."  I had heard from this friend a WEEK BEFORE where he told me he had fainted. We talked about low blood sugar, etc, but I had not told anyone about it.  And here was Luana showing Jennifer that this actually happened.  She gave me some medical advice for me to pass along to this fellow, which I did. 

The point of the story is that Luana from her perspective over 20 years off the planet, saw this friend faint, mentioned it to Jennifer this past week later and she mentioned it to me.

I see it as a confirmation that life goes on - but I won't make the argument, because what's the point? Not everyone is supposed to know how the play ends. The message was private and I passed it along.  

And now about Cannes - some years ago I was on a yacht moored in Cannes for Robert Altman's movie. At the party, Robert's wife said to me "You know Luana is responsible for Bob's career."  I asked "How so?" She said "She starred in his film, "That Cold Day in the Park" and when it showed in Cannes, Luana's pal Jack Nicholson was in Cannes for Easy Rider and when he went to the screening he told everyone what a genius Bob is.  And that's how his career began."

I had never heard this story.  Then today, when Peter Fonda posted this mention of how this year they're screening "Easy Rider" a number of stories came back.

CREDIT: HUFFSCHMITT/SIPA/NEWSCOM

Once, in Boston, Luana and I were having a pint in "The Sevens" on Charles Street.  A group of backpacking students asked to share our table, and revealed they were from France. We went around the table introducing ourselves, and this one girl froze. "Luana is your name? Like the actress Luana Anders?" Luana smiled; "Yes that's me."  The girl said "I worked in the movie theater on the Champs Elysee where "Easy Rider" ran for 20 years. I always wondered who you were and now I'm sitting with you."

After I met Luana at USC film school, years later, she was invited to the 25th anniversary of the film in Santa Fe. We went together and said hello to Dennis, Peter and others.  They all treated her as if she was someone special to have known or to be around.  (I've always seen that among her friends - as if they always knew her, and would always know her.)



So today while posting something on "the book of Faces" about Cannes and the screening, I was writing the story of Bob Altman's wife telling me that Luana was responsible for his career... and I heard Dennis say "I went to that screening too."  I thought - "What? Did I just hear Dennis say that I got the story wrong?"

A few seconds later, the cell rang and it was the Oscar winning screenwriter Robert Towne whom I worked for years ago, whom Luana had introduced us.  He said "Isn't it Lulu's birthday today?"

Robert when Luana intro'd me to him, and worked for
him on Personal Best. In this photo as an actor. (Stephen Vaughan)

I said - "Yes, it is. And funny you should call.  Can you confirm if Dennis went to the screening of "Cold Day in the Park" in Cannes? There was a long pause, and then Robert replied "I think that's a yes."  

What are the odds of him calling me at the same moment I was writing that?

Directing Rod Taylor and Luana in "Point of Betrayal"

Luana and I were in Cannes together in 1986, with Jonathan Krane raising funds for "Limit Up."  I partied with my old pal Bill Paxton who had finished a B movie in Turkey, and Luana was dolled up in her designer gown she brought for the trip. Bill and I lost money at Roulette, while it was Luana's only trip to the festival - it featured one hilarious encounter in a pub.

We were sitting at a group table with some young actors. She was asked by Cary Elwes (Princess Bride) to "tell a joke" - she said "I can't tell a joke, honestly" but Cary insisted. He was making everyone at our table "tell a joke." 

Luana's best pal Sally Kellerman with her late
husband Jonathan Krane

She looked at me, and I said "tell Jonathan's joke you heard this morning." So she told a joke she heard about a notorious film producer - (which I later used in "Cannes Man")

"Three hookers are in Cannes; they ask "Who would you agree to have sex with for free?"  One says "Sean Connery" the second says "Tom Cruise" the third says "Elliot Kastner." The other hookers look at her and say "Who's that?" And the hooker says "I don't know but everyone walks around Cannes saying "F*%k Elliot Kastner! F*%k Elliot Kastner!" 

When she got to the punchline, Cary's face turned beet red, and his friends fell over laughing, and we didn't know why they did until Sally Kellerman revealed it to Luana the next day. Everyone at the table knew (but me and Luana) that Elliot Kastner was Cary's step-father.  Ah, if only I had a cellphone camera to film Luana's reaction:  "D'oh!"

Producer Jonathan Krane brought us to Cannes in 1986He was the source of said joke.

Later when I took over the film "Cannes Man" - in 1996 - Dennis was already in it, and later we chatted about how I had "directed him in a film although we hadn't met on set" (I finished the film) we talked about his connection to Luana and he seemed to be profoundly moved to talk about her after her passing.

So here it is - Cannes is beginning again, the film that Dennis directed that changed the face of independent cinema is unspooling on the Croisette, Luana and pals will appear in the festival again, this time with more friends from the film on the Flipside.  

And she is still "working with them" proving on a weekly basis through our filmed conversations that she not only still exists, but she can help folks on the flipside to connect with people here, and can help me to translate what she's doing into books that people can read and contemplate how life does indeed "go on."  

Easy Riding into the Sunset to to speak.

So Happy Mothers day everyone, and happy birthday to you Luana, and happy birthday to to everyone who has come to the realization that they chose their mom for a reason, chose their life for a reason, and can sit back and applaud the clever math of it all.  

At some point I stop saying the word coincidence - when actually it's just complex math. The mathematics of being able to stimulate Robert to call me at 9:30 in the morning, the math of having me just have written this note on Facebook about Luana, the math of me starting this post and then hearing "It's about Mother's Day" and ... etc. etc. etc.

So on this Mother's Day - I'm honoring my mom, the mother of me - but my other moms as well, the mothers who put up with me in previous lifetimes, and the Mother of Flipside Research, Luana Anders, who was born on this day.

Timeless photo of the both of us.

She ain't gone. She just ain't here.

If you want to hear what she has to say from the Flipside, this is the foreword she "wrote" for our book "Backstage Pass to the Flipside: Talking to the Afterlife with Jennifer Shaffer."  

FOREWORD

by Luana Anders  

Forewords are an unusual introduction to the material inside a book. In “Flipside: A Tourist’s Guide on How to Navigate the Afterlife” Harvard PhD Gary Schwartz offered to write the foreword, where he said that “self science” was something Einstein had done, and he felt my “journey into the Flipside” should be considered as part of that canon.

In “It’s a Wonderful Afterlife volume one” Charles Grodin suggested in his foreword that he didn’t quite know what to make of my forays into the afterlife but enjoyed my passion for them. In Volume two, Galen Stoller, a young man who passed away some years ago wrote an eloquent foreword from where he is now, detailing what he wanted to impart about the journey. “It is a wonderful afterlife,” he wrote (via a medium), “but only because “it is wonderful to be alive.”

I suggested my pal and compatriot in this endeavor medium/intuitive Jennifer Shaffer should write the foreword, as she’s the conduit for this research. But while we were discussing this, Luana Anders, my friend and inspiration for this journey (who passed in 1996 after our being best friends for 20 years), suggested (through Jennifer) that she wanted to write her own foreword to this book.

Note: Luana, besides being an actress who appeared in 30 features (including “Easy Rider”) also appeared in 300 TV shows. Her film writing credits include “Fire On The Amazon” and “Limit Up” written with yours truly.) At some point in this book, she suggested I try “automatic writing.” I sat in front of the keyboard, put my fingers on the keys and thought; “Type whatever comes to mind.” I opened myself up to the possibility I could write something on her behalf:

“First, let me be clear. Richard is not talking through me. I am talking to him through Jennifer (usually). She does her best to make it easy for him to understand what I’m trying to say, and I’m doing my best to make it easier for him to understand.  But it is leaning in from both sides.

(Note: Like the 11:11 example Luana cites later in the book.)

At the moment, Richard is typing this sentence and has put his mind on virtual hold (he claims it’s a meditation technique) to allow “me” to take over his typing.  Some people call this “automatic writing.” Doesn’t mean it’s any good. It just means it’s automatic.  No brain stem involved.

First I’d would like to point out that chanting “Nam Myoho Renge Kyo”[1] saved my life. I know that Richard used to tease me about it, make fun of it – and I’m grateful for that because it allowed me to laugh about it as well.

(Note: Luana would do her “daimoku” (“Nam-myoho-renge-kyo” prayer) in the car on the way to an event. She’d chant at lightning speed, decades of practice, which sounds a bit like “homina homina munya homina.” I would imitate her and she couldn’t help but laugh. Chanting helped her navigate her fear of parties. Luana was an incredible listener, and on more than one occasion, I’d leave her for ten minutes at some tony event, come back to find a close friend sobbing, pouring out his/her life to her. She had incredible compassion, even as a listener.)

But it saved my life. I never would have made it as long as I did on the planet without being able to focus on something else so dear to me.  Saving humanity by chanting about it.  If you’re not familiar with it, if you’re suffering, I recommend it as a form of meditation and healing.  You pray for someone else and you are healed. Simple as that.

I suggested that I write the foreword to this book because after all, much of it is about me – and I have little to say in the matter. Believe me, it was as shocking to me as it was to my class to have him (Richard) appear as he did – willy nilly – in front of my classroom over here.[2] 

He just started speaking out loud as if was completely normal that some ghostly avatar would appear in front of our class and start blathering away about his “research.”

But I applaud him for it.  He’s got cojones this boy.  I can call him a boy – because I know him better than most.  He’s endearing... to me and to others. But at his core, he’s that little boy that I’ve known for a long, long time. 

It’s important work that he is doing, important work that he and Jennifer are doing. To help us communicate with all of you back there on the planet, and to open up people’s minds about the ability to do so.  It’s happened not because of any great cataclysmic event that’s in the offing – it’s happening because it’s time. It’s time to shift consciousness, to shift gears to understand the nature of reality.

It’s going to upset some people, but we’re on top of that as well.  It’s going to liberate most people.  Help most people. And ultimately turn out to be completely accurate when others figure this process out. 

Some may ask “Why now?” Some may ask “Is this a good thing to do to communicate with our elders and loved ones who’ve gone on?”  Well, we still have things to communicate to you, we still have thoughts, dreams, feelings and hope for humanity – because we consider ourselves part of your journey as well.  You may not think of us that way – but we think of you that way.

So please, allow me to offer this small token of appreciation for the fellow who is typing this sentence.  Yes, you are a goofball Richard, you are someone that has vexed and frustrated me during my life, but also during other lifetimes.

But you also taught me how to laugh, how to let go, and how to be more of myself while I was on the planet.  I know what my path was about, I know why I had to depart early – eventually you’ll come to know these reasons as well.  Suffice to say it’s okay not to “know everything” or “why everything happens” but it is good to trust in the idea that they do “happen for a reason.”

And let’s focus on that for a moment – “focus on reason.” What is reasoning? Taking the evidence presented in front of us, and trying to figure out what it means and how it can help me in my journey.  We reason things out because that’s what we do with our minds... we also can go “beyond reason” and allow things to happen to us, or for us... and that’s how I want you to consider what you’re about to read.  That this goes “beyond reason.”  And there’s a reason for that as well.

Okay, I’m telling Richard to stop now – and to let our mutual friend Jennifer go over this text and see what “resonates” or rings true for her.  After all – it’s those “feelings of resonance” when we get a shiver of truth, or when we get a feeling that we’re actually learning or talking about something that’s beyond our logic and thought, beyond our mind... that we truly are able to learn things... about the nature of reality and about the nature of ourselves.  I’m fortunate because Richard can type at the speed of thought – I’m watching him do this as we speak, and I suggest a plethora of ideas and he’s able to blast them onto the page.

One more thing about love. I love you all. I’m not just saying that as a phrase – but I want you to really feel what I’m saying. I LOVE YOU. I send my heart and soul and unconditional love to you who are reading this sentence.  I hope and pray that you receive this love because love is what moves this universe, it is the giant engine of who we are, it’s what or who God is, it’s what or who we are.  If you can wrap your mind around love – that’s great – if you can’t, that’s okay too, just open your heart up to the idea of it.

Love yourself. Love your neighbor. Love your enemy. Love the idea of love, of creating love, or spreading love of being loved and giving it in return.  That’s about all I have to say on the topic except... “See you on the flipside.” (To quote a corny phrase too often used by a close friend of both of ours.)

PS: (It’s) Just a few days after my birthday – I would have been xxx age in your realm – but over here – not such a big deal. Which I prefer. Enjoy the cake.

Written (as if channeled) by Luana Anders 

---

[1]  SGI/NSA Buddhist chant. http://www.sgi.org/about-us/president-ikedas-writings/gongyo-and-daimoku.html

[2]  It was during my first deep hypnosis session where I found myself standing in her classroom, interrupting it. Everyone turned in shock as I appeared. She looked at me as if to say “WTF?” She looked about 20 years younger than when I knew her – at least 10 years before I met her. She looked embarrassed to see me standing in the class talking – but I continued to speak. (Flipside)

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY ANTHY AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY LUANA!!!!

When I put this pic on the fridge after she passed in 1996 I said aloud

 "The essence of our relationship! Cookies and cappuccinos,"

When Charles Grodin had James Van Praagh on his talk show, a few months after she died, Chuck and I thought up a way to see if he could talk to our mutual pal Luana. I called in from Santa Monica

and James said live on the air; "She's telling me there's a photograph on your refrigerator that is the essence of your relationship." Indeed.