Buddhism and the Flipside

Miscellaneous

Saturday

Suicide and other lovely Flipside topics regarding Kate, Anthony and Robin

Well, it's in the news.
From the Observer Website
Kate Spade's husband revealed she had been "taking medications for depression" for the past 5 years.

Anthony Bourdain's best friend said he'd been in a "dark mood for days."

Here's an excellent article written by a friend of his about suicide.

What's that about? Alas poor Yorick, I knew him... not so well?

Worth reading repeating. Ah. Mig. Da. La. Amygdala. It's the tiny walnut sized part of the brain that regulates serotonin. It becomes damaged by fill in the blank. 
Drugs/trauma/indifference/tragedy/medicine/PTSD. Anyone can fix it themselves. See Richard Davidson research. Up to you.

(SSRI drugs like prozac regulate serotonin, but reports are that up to 15% of the people who take them have adverse "serious side effects" - the drugmakers websites warn people about them, ideations of violence or self harm" - but for some unknown reason - the test that anyone can take to see if they can tolerate these drugs - is almost never given (according to a doctor friend of mine.)  So - if someone is prescribing you serotonin inhibitors - check to see if you can take the test, or check into Richard Davidson's work that shows a particular form of meditation can change the amygdala and help it regulate serotonin.  Not opinion, theory or belief - but science.)

In my work with Jennifer Shaffer, we run into people on the flipside who've committed suicide "all the time." Someone just wrote me about it being a "solution" for some folks... all I can do is report what I'm learning. 

In the case of "genetics" I've learned that meditation can cure or alleviate depression. In terms of drug therapy, I've found that meditation affects the same part of the brain the drugs are designed to affect; the amygdala. But in terms of the spirituality - ay, there's the rub. He's not gone. He's just not here. Kate is not "gone" she's just "not here." Here's the reply I wrote about the topic, that I'm sharing in public because... well... it needs to be repeated:

As to "why would someone commit suicide, was it a life's plan?" It's much much much more complex and complicated according to this flipside research. Each person has their own reasons - there can be 1. soul reasons 2. sociological reasons 3. genetic reasons. No one reason outweights the rest, and usually is a combination of all three.

If you start with "we don't die" then you can examine the process... why do we come here? why did he or kate choose their lifetime? If you examine these - you need to talk to them directly. "Why did you choose this lifetime?" Why did you choose to leave it in this way?" These questions are knowable,and believe me, I ask them.

I do so in my next book with the help of a medium... (Jennifer Shaffer) and we explore all the possibilities.

 Only Anthony (or Kate, or Robin Williams) can answer this question. 

I can tell you that many reply "It's a combination of all three" - the SSRI drugs, the unbearable genetic code issues with dealing with depression, the sociological issues - and even the example of an "exit point" - that they took "because they felt they had done all they can do."

In one case, we heard "I did this so I could experience all the pain that I brought to my family and friends so I could learn a lesson for a future life where I will help people with these kinds of issues."

I don't take suicide lightly - (and Jennifer deals with it on a daily basis) but I don't shy away from examining it. What people say is consistent from the flipside - that they still exist, that they still grieve and mourn and feel bad about what's happened... but some claim it was "meant to be" some claim that "they're still here, still helping." 

Some have said "everyone commits suicide every puff of a cigarette, every pill they drop - they all want to numb themselves and not be alive" - that's another way of viewing it. But all I can say is "if you want to know why someone checked themself off stage, you must ask them to get a solid answer."

If you want to read up on a person who took their own life,then wrote a book about it from the flipside, I recommend reading Erik Medhus' book "My Life After Death" - it's a frank, stark discussion of what it was like for someone to take his own life, then realize he hadn't ended his life at all... and then dealing with the pain and suffering he'd caused... 

However, he found a way to reach out to his mother (Dr. Elisa Medhus) and together with a variety of mediums,he's been in constant contact with her. (Channeling Erik- conversations of a mother with her son in the afterlife)

I can tell you that I've "heard his voice" at the end of one conversation he recently had with Stephen Hawking (anyone can hear it on youtube at the end of their talk) and I know Dr. Medhus personally - and know from her own lips how her son "called her on the phone" one day from the flipside.

In this talking about suicide - and we should talk about it openly and without fear of being mocked or lessened in any way - it's something that we can deal with, treat, work on. 

Once we come to realize we chose this lifetime, we chose being here - and when we "kill ourselves" we don't kill anything - we just put ourselves into a state of not being able to experience things that we experience here (breathing, tactile sensations, other tasty treats) we realize why we chose to come here in the first place, and why we should have stuck around to "see how the third act plays out."

People consistently report that once we are "back home" (their words, and I've filmed 45 deep hypnosis sessions and examined thousands of others) they experience "unconditional love" but also the regret they have for engendering pain in others, in making the journey that less bearable for others.

Yes, it's a form of "giving up" or "tearing up the contract" (or as Val Kilmer said "cheating") - but if you come from a place of unconditional love (and that's what people consistently report) then you have the ability - we all have the ability - to regard these events with unconditional love.

Give it freely. Give it to Anthony. To Kate. UNCONDITIONALLY. To those who you love and you don't want to see leave who are struggling. But remind them; "Hey you SIGNED UP FOR THIS. AND DAMMIT I NEED YOU TO STICK THE F*&K AROUND." Remind them why they should stick around. Make them laugh. Then make them laugh harder. And finally; make them laugh some more. If they're so busy wetting their pants while laughing, the idea of checking themself off the planet seems further away.

Off soap box. (back to your commerically sponsored social media construct.)


Image may contain: 2 people, people sitting
From Asia Argento a few weeks ago.

Just said to the family "let's Bourdain." Meaning "let's explore some neighborhood and try a place we've never tried before." #bourdain A new verb. "Not gone. Just not here."

https://www.richardjdavidson.com/

Finally, about Robin William's New Documentary:

Here's the first review of Robin's upcoming HBO show - (trailer is below) and an excerpt from "Backstage Pass - Talking to the Flipside" with Jennifer Shaffer" 



Jennifer and I "listen in" to our "class" on the Flipside, (class is moderated by Luana Anders, our "professor.") Various people I knew Luana knew, or Jennifer knew or has met offer insight during our sessions. 

In this case, I'd met Robin before, he's made a number of "appearances" (in "Hacking the Afterlife") The responses we gather in these sessions are sometimes profound, often hilarious, sometimes eerily on point. In this case, I had just heard there was going to be a documentary about him - Jennifer knew nothing about it. I ask the questions,Jennifer (the medium/intuitive) offers what she hears.

Rich: Hi class. Who wants to talk?

Jennifer: Robin. (Williams)

R: Hey, there’s a documentary coming out about you – someone who loves you made it.

J: “Magical,” he says. His family is really involved in this, feels like.

R: So your review is “It’s magical?”

J: "Magical but not the beginning. It builds up the story."

R: What’s the beginning about?

J: "His parents."

R: They’re trying to rationalize why you took your own life?

J: "They talk about cocaine (in the show)."

R: Is it inaccurate or not the whole picture?

J: “Just not the whole picture. They shouldn't emphasize the struggle as much.” Robin showed me the homeless guy.

R: “Radioman?” The character he played in “The Fisher King” with Jeff Bridges?

J: "Hollywood’s like that; they just do that."

This was recorded A YEAR AGO. I had no idea what the story would be like - and as you'll see it's just what he's saying it is.

Our class often admonishes me (often) for not sharing what we "hear" whenever we hear it. "You're holding back." 

Am posting this as a "review" from "Robin:" "Magical!" I'm sure the film will be hilarious, but will likely leave out the part that includes the minor detail that our loved ones are often still accessible; "Not gone. They're just not here."